“It’s ruined my life”.
Sex is natural and essential part of being human, without it life would cease, and for most people it’s an enjoyable experience. But for individuals like Steve it has completely destroyed their life.
WHAT IS A SEX ADDICTION?
Hyper sexuality in the past was used to define this group of individuals, who were unusually and unhealthily preoccupied with sex. Society and scientists alike believing one can only be addicted to drugs and alcohol. But due to a number of factors, including a more liberal society and research highlighting the parallels in the hyper sexual and drug addicted brain. “Sex addition” has become a popular phrase, admittedly with the help of a few celebrities. However the DSM – 5 hasn’t yet classified it as a disorder. Therefore at the current time there is no clear cut definition of what a sex addiction is and whether it exists. But generally speaking it can be described as a compulsive need to perform sexual acts in order to achieve a kind of “fix”.
CHILDHOODS OF SEX ADDICTS
Patrick Carnes, Ph.D has found that 81% of sex addicts were sexually abused as a child. Sex becoming a way for a child to overcome the trauma they are going through, leading to a dependency on sex to cope.
Children who are abused for a extended period, will also have sustained elevated stress levels, impeding on their brain development. This alteration in their brain structure may explain why they are more susceptible to addictions including that of sex. . In addition children with restrictive backgrounds in terms of sex and intimacy, have been found to be more likely to have a sex addition.
Sex addiction and comorbid disorders
Sex addiction is presented coexisting with other disorders. One study found that only 17% of patients had only a sex addiction, 42% having an additional a chemical addiction. This may suggest that some individuals have a predisposition to addictions, also suggesting they all have a similar etiology. Another study found that 70% of the women also had anorexia. The occurrence of these co-morbidities suggests that they have a common origin.
Neurobiology of sex addiction
The brain is a complex being, and the stem of our thoughts, feelings and desires. So when investigating sex addiction it is a vital component. Surprisingly there is only a small amount of data on the neurobiology of addiction, which isnt very reliable. However the loss of control of sexual behaviours with those with hyper sexuality, may be due to abnormalities in the basal ganglia and/or the prefrontal cortex.
Is sex addiction OCD?
There are many similarities between sex addiction and OCD, and some people believe OCD is a more accurate description of hyper sexuality, than an addiction. The ocd model suggests that sexual behaviours are anxiety driven, and relieve the anxiety that a person is expieriencing. And intrusive thoughts about sex are also a sign of OCD.
Real life experiences
For a small minority of people this is their life and they have to live with this every day. So they are the experts, so let’s listen to them.
“It can become a compulsive thing. An expectation. Wake up, fondle, get erect, pump it, sometimes it can take ages because there’s been over stimulation over such a long time. Ejaculate, catch breath, wipe it up, go and shower. You’ve drained your balls but there was no excitement, no feelings of ecstasy, no shuddering climax. Just a squirt of mess on your belly to be wiped up and disposed of.” – Micheal
“Can do.. when I have real horn on and my fuck buddies aren’t around and I don’t want to wank then yeah I can’t stop thinking about how to get laid” – James
“Its ruined my life. If i go a day without i cant concentrate. I spend most days scouring websites for new partners and nights trawling bars. People get boring to me fast and ive spent a fortune chasing things that bring me no satisfaction” – Steve
Sex is always going to be a stigmatized topic. But people here have shared their experiences and they are funny lovely people who have helped me out loads. Society can be a dick stigmatizing others and hence preventing them from getting the help they need. And to any sex addicts, I love you 💜💜💜💜!!!